New Beginnings

Today, I am so grateful. Grateful for the ups and the downs. I hate sounding like a cheeseball (I still hold the ridiculous notion that somewhere in the Universe someone might still consider me cool), but the truth is that I’m a grateful cheeseball. A grateful, recovery alcoholic cheeseball.

• I think I found a meditation group to meet with. Finally, a Sangha!
• I have a friend. A real friend. A new friend that accepts me how I am and is not in the program.
• I love my husband. And he loves me….whack job that I am.
• I am sober. I was introduced to AA and it works for me.
• New products and authentic marketing. Work can be fun. Always too much to get done, but still fun. It is what I make it.
• My children. Right now they shine in my eyes. School is good and they are happy. Can a mother ask for more?
• Just the sheer possibility that we might one day (soon?) have a mother as President make me giddy. Fucking giddy.
• Busy weekend plans: hair (where the hell did that gray come from!?), moving friends, meetings, children’s birthday parties, movies, fellowship, organic chicken and spaghetti.
• My BFF’s new baby will be born soon and I will be privileged to be there. I will be emotionally and physically available to my dearest friend and her family.

Since I’m obviously fighting some kind of funk (Jeff just refuses to believe the claim that I might have a brain tumor), I thought I might follow Trudge’s cue and write a gratitude list. Today, I am grateful for:

• Good music
• My husband that loves me, even though I’m a loon
• My kids that think I’m a good mom, even when I’m not
• My mom’s successful surgery
• My company moving forward
• Beautiful, blue skies
• Pretty, old beads
• One more sober day
• Simple knitted baby bibs that keep my hands and head busy
• My BFF, MoMo, that I miss every day

(I thought Max’s Monkey Circus (created from tinker toys and a miniature barrel of monkeys) was a good analogy for my life. So am I the bearded monkey? Maybe the monkey on the tightrope?)